December 31, 2010: In a rambling, blathering 2500 word blog post, unemployable skank Lena Chen reveals that her cocksucky blog, sexandtheivy.com, was a drunken mistake: "I was drinking to the point of blacking out 3 or 4 times a week," writes Lena Chen. Lena Chen also reveals that Harvard kicked her out of school on account of a 20 page paper which Lena Chen was too lazy and stupid to write. Amusingly, Lena Chen seems surprised by her lack of long-term memory: given all the drugs she was doing with her teacher Patrick Hamm (Note: Patrick Hamm also got his Harvard student Lena Chen a fake ID so she could barhop with her teacher Patrick Hamm), it's a surprise Lena Chen even remembers her sugardaddy asian fetish boi Patrick Hamm. (Amusingly, Lena Chen's blog traffic has dropped to a handful--like whore Steph Burton [stephiebee] and asianfetish fanboi Jeff Byrnes sick yellowfever [Berklee boi] and dumbskank Dunja Nedic.) LOL Lena Chen
December 31, 2010: Desperate for any small crumb of validation, slut Lena Chen reblogs a
random comment by some dumbcunt Erin Stewart (thinkofprettythings.tumblr.com) on her slutblog. Erin Stewart is insecure that she goes to a third-tier toilet university (The Australian National University), so Erin Stewart is encouraged by failure Lena Chen's defensive shitting on Harvard. (For more on moron Erin L. Stewart, who surfs on Lena Chen's pornblog, see this link: http://au.linkedin.com/in/erinlstewart)
December 30, 2010: Jobless Lena Chen blogs about her latest spending spree (Rider Tee for $12.99 (down from $40) | Neck Warmer Dress for $20 (down from $70) OMG!!1); Lena Chen, who has been unemployed after being dumped by Harvard in May, no doubt got the spending money by sucking her former teacher sugardaddy Patrick Hamm's cock extra hard in his Harvard teaching office...
December 29, 2010: Insecure over the utter failure her life has become since Harvard booted her worthless skank ass, Lena Chen bitterly shits on Harvard...again (see here for moar).
December 27, 2010: Showing how much she "respects" her "friends" privacy, drunkskank Lena Chen blabs about: (1) how her "bestie" Jason D. Burke loves gobbling cockknobs. Jason D. Burke was almost as much of an utter FAIL at Harvard as Lena Chen: apparently, Jason Burke was too busy drinking with Lena Chen (and sucking cock) to end up anywhere better than third-tier toilet Boston College School of Law. (For MOAR on faghag Lena Chen's pet fag Jason D. Burke, see here: http://www.linkedin.com/in/jasondburke), and (2) how Lena Chen's selfish cuntfriend Courtney Kennedy made a phony melodramatic suicide gesture in Germany; like Lena Chen, dumbcunt Courtney Kennedy (likepolishingfirewood.tumblr.com) got kicked out of Harvard, too (for more on Courtney Kennedy, see details: here)
December 27, 2010: Realizing that her talents are unable to get her a job (well, except for the job sucking sugardaddy Patrick Hamm's cock after doing drugs with her former teacher Patrick Hamm), Lena Chen reveals she wants to bilk the government out of school loan money and go to graduate school.
December 26, 2010: Lena Chen, who lacks the attention span to parse anything longer than a Chinese fortune cookie, praises selfish psychocunt Courtney Kennedy's insipid blogpost as "brilliant."
December 22, 2010: "PATRICK HAMM CANT PAY MY CREDIT CARD BILL BECOZ BANK OF AMERICA WONT RECOG'ZE MY COMPUTER AND WE CANT CALL THEM, FML!!!11" tweets jobless Lena Chen while jetsetting in Germany (between bukkake sessions with her sociology teacher Patrick Hamm) Lena Chen is also upset that, owing to her blackout drinking, Lena Chen cannot recall some of the charges she made on the credit card Patrick Hamm pays for...
December 21, 2010: "WRITING ABT THE HELTH BENEFTZ OF MASTURBATION AND ORGAZMS, OMG!11" tweets Lena Chen, revealing her inability to write about anything that doesn't involve shoving something into one of her orifices.
December 20, 2010: Jobless since May (except for her job letting sugar daddy Patrick Hamm jizz on her face [picture of Patrick Hamm's jizz on Lena Chen's face Patrick Hamm here and here]), Lena Chen's inflated sense of entitlement leads her to beg Patrick Hamm Patrick Hamm Patrick Hamm to pay for her to jetset to Germany for Christmas holiday.
December 17, 2010: Lena Chen shows no sign of shutting the fuck up about the Julian Assange fake rape charges. Very hypocritical of Lena Chen, since EVERYONE KNOWS how much Lena Chen welcomes rapesex from her sugardaddy Patrick Hamm.
December 15-16, 2010: Desperate to suck some NEW cock before jetsetting off to Germany to be with her sugardaddy Patrick Hamm, Lena Chen visits asian fetish dude Zac Pollinger, after having cookie-cutter azn skankblogger Zoe Yang pay for Lena Chen's dinner ("IN THE FINANCIAL DISTRICT!!11 OMG!!!1" tweets Lena Chen)
December 15, 2010: With Lena Chen's asian fetish sugar daddy Patrick Hamm in Germany, Lena Chen [Lena Chen Glamour] tweets that she's in New York, hooking up with past fuckbuddies (ex Zac Pollinger (Zachary Pollinger)). "Are these the ones in print?" wonders skank Sarah E. Brown (aka "sarahsuperb" who administrates gabrielcousens.com). Famewhore Lena Chen, humiliated that no one remembers anything about her except the pics she posted of Patrick Hamm spooging his cum on Lena Chen's face, begs a producer at MTV for a spot on
"The Seven" (Another azn attention whore, Jing Yang, soon follows suit.)
December 14-15, 2010: Desperate for any crumb of recognition, attention whore Lena Chen creams her pussy over interviewing two no-name worthless skanks (Aja Johnson [@imnotasia] and Maria Diaz [@mariadiaz]) for some no-name blog.
December 13, 2010: Since Patrick Hamm is in Germany, this means unemployed Lena Chen [Lena Chen twitter] is free from the chore of satisfying Patrick Hamm's sexual mores; rather than hunt for a job, Lena Chen [Lena Chen Harvard] goes to Chelsea and drinks the night away.
December 10, 2010: Lena Chen warns skankblogger Helen Chiu (aka zoeynym) about the perils of being a whore: "He's going to divorce you once he realizes he married a ho!" Lena Chen says of Helen Chiu's master Marcus Galindo, "Your comeuppance is impending, you Jezebel!" (Rather ironic that Lena Chen would give relationship advice, since jobless Lena Chen's "relationship" involves renting out her gash to her sugardaddy Patrick Hamm.)
December 10, 2010: Despite "studying" German for a year (to better fulfill Patrick Hamm's nazi white fetish desires), Lena Chen reveals that she can't parse it for shit without running to Google Translate. Also (yes, jobless Lena Chen twitters A LOT), Lena Chen posts shit about her former friend, Jason D. Burke, who, like slut Lena Chen, fucked up so badly at Harvard UG that only shiTTThole Boston College School of Law would hold their nose and accept Jason D. Burke's goattse'd ass.
December 8, 2010: Unemployed skank Lena Chen wastes the day tweeting about such earthshattering shit as her dog's diarrhea (twice) and how childbirth causes women to shit. Which goes to show how little Lena Chen actually learned anything at Harvard (besides how to stuff cocks and food into Lena Chen's orifices...). Lena Chen also tweets a deep query about making spam musubi to skank Jing Yang (aka jingtastic).
December 7-8, 2010: Lena Chen actually calls her fuckbuddy Patrick Hamm's "jetsetting" dog, Hamlet, "spoiled." Amusing that Lena Chen [Lena Chen photos], who refuses to get a job, sponges off Patrick Hamm's money (in exchange for various oral and anal "favours" no doubt), and will spend Christmas in Germany on Patrick Hamm's dime, and (...) would not see the hilarious hypocrisy of Lena Chen calling ANYONE "spoiled."
December 7, 2010: One of Lena Chen's handful of readers notices that Lena Chen is too lazy to actually WRITE BACK to emails from Lena Chen's retarded handful of "fans"
December 2, 2010: Desperate for any crumb of validation, jobless attentionwhore Lena Chen squeals over a crap "shoot" she'll do with dumbcunts Carlin Ross and Rachel Kramer Bussel. Lena Chen also mentions she will reveal the number of guys who have plugged Lena Chen's diseased cunt as part of the "notes" accompanying the photos.
December 1, 2010: Talentless Lena Chen tries to "write" an "article" about her maid-mommy's abusive marriage to Lena Chen's daddy, restauranteur George Chen, which fucked up Lena Chen (and UCSD sister Gina Chen) for life. Lena Chen's shitty article is roundly mocked by readers of the site.
November 30, 2010: Unemployed Lena Chen, who gets her money after sucking sugardaddy Patrick Hamm's azn-fetished cock, blogs about spending assloads of money for computer trinkets. That same day, dumbcunt Lena Chen blathers on about virginity being a "social construct." Amusingly, Lena Chen is too much of a moron to realize that the SAME ARGUMENTS show that RAPE is a "social construct" as well.
November 28-29, 2010: Lena Chen (whose "writing" doesn't even gross $20K/year) blogs about dropping several hundred dollars of sugardaddy Patrick Hamm's money on panties at RueLaLa and a Miraculous Bra for Lena Chen's muffin-top titties (picture of Lena Chen's tits here). Enablers of Lena Chen's whoreblog, cunty Leila Cohan-Miccio and tiny-titted skank Jennifer Ross (nymphetinrepose @ University of Ottawa)
November 23, 2010: Attention whore Lena Chen squeals over her latest YouTube skankvid, recorded with fired-from-McKinsey-for-online-nudie-pics whore Zoe Yang (aka Jing Yang aka Yijing Yang), hocunt Chloe Angyal and cumdumpster Amelia Parry-McDonell
November 17, 2010: Lena Chen blogs about that other cookie-cutter azn blogwhore, Zoe Yang
(aka Jing Yang aka Yijing Yang): "AWKWARD THINGS THAT OCCUR BECAUSE OF THE INTERNET: The random “third” Zoe Yang found on CraigsList for her threesome with Holden Groves? They tried to add her on LinkedIn. Perhaps they’ll even “recommend” you to their colleagues. (No, this did not happen
to me. [It happened to Jing Yang] No, my anonymous friend [Yijing Yang aka jingtastic] did not accept the request.)" ProTip: if you want to find the skankslut who
creams for threesomes, fantasizing about being a Vietnamese prostitute, and having her tits
smacked HARD, just add zoeyijingyang on LinkedIn:
November 16, 2010: Lena Chen makes a note to visit KaDeWe the next time she jetsets to Berlin on her sugar daddy faggot Patrick Hamm's money
November 9, 2010: After Lehigh whore Jessica Chu [email@example.com ] squeals for it, attention whore Lena Chen offers another "Anatomy of a Shopping Spree": Lena Chen (whose writing "job" fetches less than $20K/year, before taxes) details how she wasted several hundred dollars of sugardaddy Patrick Hamm's money.
October 31, 2010: Jobless Lena Chen pisses away $150 of sugardaddy Patrick Hamm's money on Hello Kitty shit. (Meanwhile, Patrick Hamm dresses up as an asian fetish pedophile for Halloween...)
October 30, 2010: Unemployed Lena Chen, who would be homeless without her sugardaddy Patrick Hamm's paying Lena Chen's bills [see "Who's Paying Lena Chen's Bills?"], shows her gratitude by emasculating Patrick Hamm YET AGAIN (see Apr 14, Oct 28)
October 28, 2010: Unemployed Lena Chen, who would be homeless without her sugardaddy Patrick Hamm's paying Lena Chen's bills, shows her gratitude by dismissing Patrick Hamm as no more "the One" than some random fuckbuddy. [That same day, Lena Chen wastes $200 of sugardaddy Patrick Hamm's money on an online shopping spree]
October 14, 2010: Lena Chen (who grosses less than $20K/year before taxes) blogs that she dropped $150 of sugardaddy Patrick Hamm's money on Hello Kitty shit.
August 11, 2010: In a rare moment of honesty, Lena Chen blogs that her shitty "writing" makes no more than $20K/year, BEFORE TAXES. Of course, Lena Chen's brain-dead enabler/readers never do teh obvious math and ask the obvious follow-up question: SO WHO IS PAYING LENA CHEN'S RENT, FOOD, AND SHOPPING SPREES?? [That same day, Lena Chen is jetsetting through Europe [no doubt spreading her legs in exchange for Patrick Hamm's $$$] and goes on a shopping spree, spending 35 Euros and 30 Pounds of Patrick Hamm's money]
June 8, 2010: Lena Chen sponges off of skank Jordan Reid to gorge on pricey food at Wasabi Lobby. Needless to say, Jordan Reid is a superficial dumbwhore who spends her time whoring herself out to "microcelebrities" then blogging about it at ramshackleglam.com, lol.
May 11, 2010: Lena Chen (who blogged that a sex blog was really "a bad idea") flies into a rage when Slate magazine points out the obvious same thing--to wit, that blogging nude photos of yourself (as Lena Chen has), photos of yourself with jizz on your face (as Lena Chen has), details of rapesex (as when Lena Chen blogged about how her sociology teacher Patrick Hamm choked her until she was forced into fucking him), druggie details (as when Lena Chen and Patrick Hamm), lawbreaking details (as when Patrick Hamm got a fake ID and bought booze for his 19-year-old student fuckthing Lena Chen)...ALL OF IT is a REALLY BAD IDEA.
April 15, 2010: Lena Chen (who's posted nude photos of herself, Lena Chen, as well as photos of herself with Patrick Hamm's cum on her face) creams in her panties when slut Chloe Angyal spurts out a hackneyed comparison of Lena Chen to Ashley Dupre [LOL!] in the Huffington Post. The blurb is yet another dead-horse flogging of the Lena Chen nude photos scandal (Can anyone say "attention whore Lena Chen"?)
April 14, 2010: Unemployed Lena Chen, who would be homeless without her sugardaddy Patrick Hamm's paying Lena Chen's bills, shows her gratitude by dismissing Patrick Hamm as no more special than a random fuck.
April 1, 2010: Lena Chen, who's posted nude photos of herself, Lena Chen, as well as photos of herself with Patrick Hamm's cum on her face, whines to the Washington City newspaper about other nude photos, posted of herself, Lena Chen, back in 2007. Dumb skank Amanda Hess gets duped by Lena Chen's lies and writes up the false article.
March 10, 2010: Lena Chen tweets that she will only use the phrase "non-marital sex" in her thesis, rather than "pre-marital sex"--lol, Lena Chen is indulging delusions of grandeur if she thinks anyone will seriously read that shit. Even Patrick Hamm said that Lena Chen (who was his student) had piss-poor grades [here's the link to Patrick Hamm dissing Lena]. Gotta wonder why Patrick Hamm passed her in his class, ay? ;)
March 4, 2010: Bitter Lena Chen whines about her college experience in an article. Then, when commenters point out that Lena Chen's drunken, drug-fueled hookups likely accounted for Lena Chen's less-than-fulfilling college experience, Lena Chen throws a temper-tantrum on her tumblr. Lena Chen's childish tantrum is quickly mocked on a prestigious Ivy League board. (Of course, Lena Chen is similarly bitter about America, and looks forward to becoming a whore for her sugar daddy Patrick Hamm in Germany.)
February 28, 2010: Lena Chen reveals that she didn't learn the meaning of "Ibid." until, um, last week. No surprise there, since Lena Chen has avoided books for the last five years, instead preferring to shove dildos up her cunt (with violent psycho Christine Yu [photo of Christine Z. Yu and Lena Chen]), jet-set through Europe (with violent psycho Courtney Kennedy), taking 115 shopping sprees, and letting Patrick Hamm shoot his jizz in her face (when Lena Chen and Patrick Hamm aren't doing drugs, that is). Then Lena Chen whines when media outlets laugh Lena Chen off as an airhead skank (see Feb 9 2010 entry)
February 24, 2010: Desperate for any crumb of validation of her whoring and shopping sprees (financed by Lena Chen's sugar daddy fuckbuddy Patrick Hamm), Lena Chen praises a blog by skank wannabe Emily Boffa. Amusingly, pinhead Emily Boffa writes that Lena Chen "rarely writes about her sex life anymore." O RLY? Perhaps slut Emily Boffa missed
- Lena Chen's recent liveblogging(s!) of having an IUD shoved up her cunt (as reported by UPENN campus slut Lindsey Stull), or
- Lena Chen's discussion of which dildoes she most enjoyed shoving up her snatch (cowritten with violent criminal offender Christine Yu).
February 15, 2010: Lena Chen tries to blame her psychiatric problems on "internet haters." Looks like Dum-dum Lena Chen forgot that she already blogged, in 2006, that her mental illness was a LIFELONG AFFLICTION. (PROTIP: Lena, if you're gonna lie, try and have a better memory, okay?)
February 9, 2010: Lena Chen, who has posted nude photos of herself, a photo of herself with cum on her face, seduced one of her teachers (Patrick Hamm), and confesses to having STDs, whines when Der Spiegel writes her off as an airhead skank.
January 9, 2010: Lena Chen pretends to be outraged about nude photos of her on the internet. An alert observer notices that Lena Chen posted nude photos on her own blog. In a fumbling bit of harried "damage control," Lena Chen scrubs the nudie pix from her blog. Unfortunately for Lena Chen, her nude pictures (as well as the picture of her after her sugar daddy Patrick Hamm spooged on her face--yep, that's Patrick Hamm's cum!) are all over the internet already...
January 7, 2010: Lena Chen writes (sans irony) that "It would have saved my sanity had a few individuals simply thought twice about clicking Post Entry." So writes Lena Chen, who has posted (and removed) scores of posts, including one where Lena Chen reveals how her teacher Patrick Hamm procured drugs and a fake ID for her, one of a photo of Lena Chen after Patrick Hamm ejaculated on her face, and one where Lena Chen posted nude photos of herself. (For moar on the Patrick Hamm scandal; for moar on Patrick Hamm)
September 22, 2009: Lena Chen tries (yet again--recall July 18, 2009 & July 20, 2008) to rationalize her claiming to be "poor" while megablogging photos of her jetsetting through Europe (again). "I probably have it better than most college students whose mothers are hotel maids," writes Lena Chen, prompting a reader to react accordingly: "Did you really type that? I guess children of hotel maids should have just been aborted before birth right? They don't need to pollute the world with their filth. You are so fucking clueless, I am glad I don't personally know you."
July 18, 2009: Lena Chen tries to "explain the haterade." Amusingly, Lena "Jetsetting to Europe/Buying Shit in New York/Stuffing My Face on Pricey Food in Philly" Chen lies that she
"had to work my ass off every term to have the same lifestyle as my college friends."
Sure, because all of our friends who "work their asses off" have SCADS
of time to post effervescent self-indulgent twitter tweets about their
latest spending spree or upscale sushi gorgefest...Also, by "work my ass off," Lena seems to mean letting her sugar daddy Patrick Hamm spurt on her face and sex her against her will.
July 17, 2009: Horrified that readers discovered Lena's twitter that confessed her sexblog
was a "bad idea," Lena Chen attempts damage control. She posts a cunt-deep-in-denial
bit of navel-gazing to her sexblog, but the truth outs itself despite Lena's best
efforts. Lena's list of things she "lost because of it: I spent most of college disassociating
myself from my peers, physically running away (to New York, to Philadelphia,
abroad), and questioning my own sanity."
July 2, 2009: "I’ve never quite understood the idea of having a “type” when it comes to dating," sez Lena "the guys I fuck are white" Chen. One of the white guys who spurts his cum on her face is her teacher Patrick Hamm.
June 30, 2009: Lena "I'm so poor I need financial aid" Chen blogs about a $167 dress she bought on a shopping spree at Ilus.
June 4, 2009: Lena "I was kicked out of Harvard my junior year" Chen blogs about "embracing her Ivy snobbery."
June 4, 2009: Lena blogs triffling tripe about whether "age is just a number." Needless to say, reader "Stacey" calls Lena Chen out on her BS. After getting the better of the argument, Stacey's comments are deleted.
June 4, 2009: Unable to secure a finance job, Lena "I flunked my Junior year" Chen blames her unemployability on "nepotism." (It's unclear why Lena is bitching when Patrick Hamm is her sugar daddy.)
May 19, 2009: Lena "I can only write about cock and pussy" Chen mocks the putative illiteracy of a poster she spotted at her former high school (Alhambra High School).
April 13, 2009: Lena Chen bitches constantly about imagined "violations" of her nonexistent "privacy"...then Lena Chen blogstalks a girlfriend of an ex-boyfriend of Lena's friend Kennedy. "They started dating on or about April 3," blogs the Junior Detective. (Oh, and Lena blogs about Kennedy's psychotic break, to boot.) Lena has also bitched that people actually followed all the breadcrumbs she dropped, and outed the teacher sexing her, Patrick Hamm.
July 20, 2008: Lena hysterically pleads poverty and insists she "works" for her money. Small problemo: Lena Chen forgets that she's already blogged that she receives an "ALLOWANCE" lol. (Some also speculate that Patrick Hamm, who ejaculates on Lena's face, is her sugar daddy.)
June 10, 2008:Lena Chen tweets about her sexbuddy (and former teacher) Patrick's getting her drugs and a fake ID...then is miffed at the scandal which results. "Patrick," as everyone knows, refers to Lena's sugar daddy Patrick Hamm.
June 10, 2008: Lena posts her sexbuddy Patrick's running-time for the Boston Marathon (for which there's a well-known search engine)...then cries outrage when her sexbuddy, Patrick Hamm, is outed.
May 28, 2008: Lena Chen posts pictures of her cum-smeared face...then is upset at the "gawking." (The cum on her face was contributed by Lena Chen's teacher, Patrick Hamm.)
January 8, 2008: Lena expresses outrage over an ex-sexbuddy posting nude pictures of her...then Lena Chen posts a set of nude pictures of herself.
June 2, 2007: "The largest amount I’ve spent in one outing this semester," blogs Lena Chen, "was $400 and this is because a completely incompetent Kate Spade clerk overcharged me. Then Bank of America/my mother/the useless piece of plastic in my wallet got all pissy on my ass."
May 21, 2007: "Wait," blogs Lena Chen, "so living like a Sex and the City character is an unhealthy thing? Fuck."
May 3, 2007: In recapping the 07-08 school year, Lena Chen has a rare moment of clarity: "My romantic turmoil, depression, insecurities — all of it played out in the public sphere. I felt anxious all the time, could barely focus on my work, and finally, pulled away violently from everyone. Months later, the solution, as it turns out, is to actually not tell everyone everything. Surprise surprise." Lena Chen quickly forgets this obvious virtue. Surprise surprise.
April 27, 2007: "I refuse to have sex again until I’m in love," blogs Lena Chen. LULZ!!
April 5, 2007: Spoiled brat Lena Chen tantrums over people calling sexandtheivy a sex blog. "This is not a blog about sex," she whines, "it is a blog about life. Woe is me, I’m a misunderstood writer who’s been given the wrong label by the world!"
April 4, 2007: "I want my professional pursuits to have little to do with this website because if I actually make it in the ultra-competitive literary world, I’d like it to be a result of talent, not accidental fame or Harvard’s marketability," Lena Chen writes...but peppers her blogs with the H-bomb and never misses a chance to famewhore for sexandtheivy.
April 3, 2007: A brief article on Lena appears in a college newspaper. Lena looses this WTF-doozy: "I don't want what I start writing about to start impacting my personal life."
February 8, 2007: "I never really viewed [sexandtheivy] as a sex blog," says bullshitter Lena Chen
February 2, 2007: Lena blogs about a Cambridge college dating site. "guys inflicted with the yellow fever can narrow their options to Asian women," says Lena "the guys I fuck are white" Chen. Later, she ends up with her yellowfever sociology teacher Patrick Hamm, who actually says Patrick Hamm is only fucking Lena Chen because she's yellow.
November 11, 2006: Lena blogs about quitting sexandtheivy...then blogs again 4 days later.
October 17, 2006: Lena blogs about drunken hookups and rubbers sliding out of her pussy, de-anonymizes her blog...then is "horrified" when her 14-year-old sister's friends hear about the blog and humiliate Lena Chen's sister, Gina Chen ("It’s so awkward when people assume I’m some slut like you," says Gina Chen)
September 5, 2006: "I don't understand how anyone but the most voyeuristic of individuals could appreciate the new Facebook," writes Lena Chen...who then blogs her own nude photos, a picture of her semen-smeared face, and revels in the post-drunksex condom exiting her Gaping Gash.
September 1, 2006: Lena is indignant over "catcalls"...then posts numerous slutty photos to her blog.
August 26, 2006: Lena names her blog sexandtheivy...then disavows comparisons to Carrie Bradshaw.